Wedding: Nayan & Lynn

I went to Nayan and Lynn's wedding in Atlanta this weekend. Took off work on Friday to drive down. The others in my car were Sando, Gbenga I., and Gbenga A. We arrived at night and the wedding was Saturday morning at 11:30am. I got up early to help set up, then the wedding plus reception, went out to eat for Saturday dinner. Church on Sunday morning with everyone from the wedding and the EC Embassy Atlanta. Went out to lunch after church with big group of people, then back in the car for the drive back, arriving back in DC late. That is the timeline version of the story.

It was really such a great weekend, an astounding wedding, fun drives, laughter, conversation.... The wedding itself was outstanding -- very simple in many ways without elaborate decorations or any sense of overdone expense. What came across most was the clear expression of true relationship. They had written some personal statements of love and commitment which were thought-provoking, poetic, true, and moving. From where I was sitting, I could see Lynn's face, tearing up as she listened to Nayan. My eyes were definitely watering too -- I can't watch such deep emotion without being moved as well. They made some very powerful statements. For example, Nayan talked about providing shade for her, leading her, defining her. I talked with Lynn about it later and I have never considered it that way before. God created a woman for Adam, but Adam was the one who named her. That principle of the man being meant to go to God and find the vision for his family and be able to bring that back and provide that to his wife. That there is some definition and identity that I cannot attain unless my husband speaks it to me.

The other clear expression of relationship was that of the community. We worshipped God at the beginning of the wedding and having so many members of Elijah Centre, we filled the area with praise. The ceremony was actually in a space that was essentially part of the foyer of the hotel, but there was no inhibition, no holding back. The family members who are not saved, or not part of our same worship culture, were standing there and I felt as if the worship must just overwhelm them. They could not help but be taken into our world. We sang "You Are" which exalts God, saying "You are who You are". And then "Together" which sings about our purpose in God, the fulfillment of all of God's will, and our standing together as a community which shall accomplish all God desires. In the context of a wedding, the lyrics were ideal. Nayan and Lynn saying they will walk in purpose together. And all of us as their family and friends, the community supporting them, that we are walking with them and they are walking with us. We are all invested in each other's lives; we have bought into each other. Nayan and Lynn have bought into my life, into the fulfillment of God's purpose in my life, and vice versa, I have bought into them. Individually before and now for them as a couple, as a family.

Another theme that came up over the weekend was my independence as woman. As a single woman, who has left my family (physically and spiritually in many ways), I've learned to be very independent -- I'm not a 'damsel in distress', I can do things for myself. But then to consider what it takes to be married, to submit. And even without that, I realize I need to develop more 'femininity'. Not a weakness of reliance, but that sense of allowing men to be men. It's an internal shift in the heart, although can start to be expressed in external things, whether it's in letting them hold doors open, carry my suitcase, drive the car, etc. That I don't need to do those things to prove that I'm strong. What does it really mean to be womanly? I think of Sis June and her descriptions of grace, prayer, care for your family, etc. I want to develop those skills further -- really the heart position of gracefulness, being constantly prayerful, concerned for the welfare of those around me (unselfish), as well as an external resourcefulness mixed with recognition of true weaknesses, care for physical appearance, etc. I also think of purity of speech and mind, lightness of heart, joy and peace -- those are the things which make a woman beautiful. Especially in this community, where the men are going through this whole Quarry process. I need to give them that space to be Quarry Men.

Another element that fascinates me with weddings is that transformation of identity. I may have an idea of who a certain guy is, but then when you see them in a relationship, you often see their real selves begin to blossom and be exposed. For example, in single life, you wouldn't have the chance to see how poetic Nayan is. I've always known that he is thoughtful, but the practical expressions and outworking of that in a relationship makes it that more evident. It makes me pause to consider how I see the guys in my life. Do I see them accurately? Do I see who they really are in God?

spacial reasoning

Back in 5th grade my teacher had me take one of those tests to see if you're gifted. The test has 3 sections: quantitative (math), verbal, and non-verbal. I scored highest in the non-verbal sections which contains various visual puzzles. Things like, of these 5 images, which one does NOT fit.

To this day, games that play on visual logic are still my favorite. Games like Tetris, Minesweeper (basic game provided by Windows), and Sudoku. I recently came across this game show for Human Tetris which I thought was hilarious. Enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=84_QL1kEmH4

human connections

For me, the first image is reminiscent of Michelangelo's "Creation of Adam". I love the juxtaposition of a world map onto the hands and what it says about the identity of each person. I personally feel like a map of many places and ideas all stitched together. I like the lines shooting from each hand, intertwining together....the electricity of touching another human being. That is what's fascinating about meeting and interacting with a new person -- discovering the map of their life, the elements that went into their development -- and the spark of new life you can create together. I want to understand others, not be turned off by our differences, but be able to decifer the true spirit behind the surface. To contribute the life of God inside of me to those I meet.

chocolate books

I love old books and the smell of the pages. I love small compartments for organizing. I love chocolate. This photo of chocolate type letters just thrills my imagination. I can just picture making a book with the pages made from catholic communion wafers and the letters from chocolate pressed onto them. Gives a whole new meaning to "devouring" a book. As well as "Man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God." Edible Bible anyone?

And the fragrance! Imagine walking through the old library at the Santo Domingo convent with the smell of a Mexican chocolate shop hovering in the air. Not just the rich scent of chocolate, but the cinnamon, chile, and other spices as well.

coat closet

Catherine and I have been looking for a 2bd/2ba apartment to move into. We're finally down to 2 choices. They are both 2-level townhouses, each with slightly varying pros and cons. One of them has little storage space, and I ran across this picture which gave me an idea for a "coat closet". In the corner of the living room, simply hang several of these wooden bird coat hangers from the ceiling, or maybe create a mobile. When no guests are over, the area will simply look like birds flying; and when guests arrive, it transforms. Unfortunately, the company currently only creates ravens. I would love to see various species: robins, bluebirds, etc. :)

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Left DC yesterday evening (Friday) and arrived in Amsterdam for layover at 7:30am. I'm on the same flight as Catherine and Akin. Since we don't fly out again until 1pm, I want to go into town, but didn't have the time to really research options prior to leaving home. I know there are Rembrandt paintings here though, so that is a priority. Found a museum shop in the airport and a book on Reijksmuseum with directions in the back, so double-checked with the cashier on exactly how to get there and talked Akin into going with me. :) Catherine can't leave the airport without a transit visa. Had to exchange some money into euros, then took the train to Amsterdam Centraal, and then a tram to the museum. Sun finally came up by the time we were taking the tram, so could see more of the city. Very dutch architecture, canals, european stores. Nothing really going on since it's early on a Saturday morning. Arrived at Reijksmuseum at about opening time, and had 1 to 1.5 hours to go through it.
Museum focuses:

• colonial power, especially naval
• dollhouses
• silverwork - gorgeous relief work
• blue & white porcelain: biblical or chinese figures, unique vases
• paintings: landscapes, still life of food, festive groups, portraits
• Rembrandt!: sober colors, stark contrasts of light, fine lines scratched into paint. focus on facial expression, little in background, true to life.
• Van Ruisdale: landscapes - low horizons
• Jan Steen
• Vermeer
• paintings of church building interiors
• Karel du Jardin: bible stories and other allegories

Really enjoyed the museum, particularly the paintings! Hurried back to the airport, picked up delicious pastries on the way. Met back up with Catherine. Turned out the plane to Nigeria was delayed an hour. Flight was another 8 hours, so slept, watched movie Stardust, and talked with the 2 Nigerians next to me. The guy asked me if I'm from New Zealand. Although I know I have a chameleon accent (changes depending on who I'm speaking with), I believe that kiwi association is a first. Quality of the airplane had decreased on this leg of the flight-- a common complaint of Africans. They pay the highest airfares, yet get the lower quality equipment. I believe this is standard across airlines, not just KLM. KLM employees also appear to be purely dutch, not international. Still, international travel is WAY nicer than domestic US flights. That fact alone helped me realize how "close" Africa is. Prior to this trip, Africa was still a very foreign place. Now I see it as simply being a longer flight away, no longer strange or unknown.

Arrived in Lagos on Saturday night. Friend of Sawyerr family (Mr. Clemons) helped us get our baggage and smooth the way through customs. Huge pile of people waiting for arrivals outside - loud and disorderly - have to push your way through, rejecting taxi offers at every turn. The airport isn't huge, but they are redoing the parking lot, so right now there is no parking which probably adds to the mayhem. Although I've been warned that traffic in Lagos is horrendous, it's very clear on the way from the airport to Sawyerr's home since it's Saturday night. The airport is on the mainland, so we cross a bridge (one of 3) to get to Victoria Island. Lagos city encompasses land on the "mainland", Lagos Island, Victoria Island, and one other island.

Arrived at Sawyerr home, ate, and went to bed at 1 or 2 am. Catherine and I are in a room with bunkbeds, AC, and our own bathroom -- wow! Slept straight through until next morning after 10am, so missed church.

Journal from Africa trip

After saving my annual leave for a whole year, I took a 2 week vacation to Nigeria and Kenya. While there, I kept a mini paper journal - something I've never done in everyday life - in order to keep track of what I was doing and document some thoughts. My goal is to now type this up so that it's accessible to me online, and perhaps to share with my family. Although my journal is relatively small, it's still a bit daunting to consider typing it's entirety, plus I'm a chronic procrastinator....thus I find myself in mid-February, a good 6 weeks post-trip, finally typing.... Enjoy.

Some background:
The trip takes place during the last 2 weeks of December 2007. The purpose of the trip is to attend Olabosipo Sawyerr's wedding in Lagos, Nigeria for the first week. My flight is from DC, layover in Amsterdam, to Lagos, along with bride's brother Akin and another friend Catherine. After the wedding, Catherine and I are continuing on to her home in Nairobi, Kenya for 1 week. I then fly home (Nairobi, layover Amsterdam, to DC) alone, while she stays on for another week before returning to DC.